LoveGIRL.
just pass me by

September 30 - 6:58pm

i've just got my caramel macchiato. there was a long line for hot drinks since it just finished raining hard and now all that's left is drizzle of rain and alot of wet ground. it's quite a long walk to the park in Leicester Square and hundreds of people are all around. i see families, tourists, couples, friends...oh the list just goes on.

i think about life here in the UK. everything is fast-paced. it's just so different.


i think about how i really have to spend alot for keeping in touch with text messages to people back home. and slowly text messages i send are lessened. and it's gonna be harder to keep in touch.

i think about i feel so left out from everything. i feel i'm missing out on alot. i'm so sad i'm not able to be a witness to all that is happening in my friends' lives. not everyone keeps in touch. but then i can't blame them. coz we're all busy anyway. sometimes i feel my friends are disappointed in me and avoiding me because of decisions i made. sometimes i feel like i'm forgetten. but that's too much drama even for me.

they say there's a reason for everything. i don't want the reason for my being here is losing everyone that means the most to me.

then i wouldn't have any reason to go back home. ='(


Saturday, September 30, 2006 | 6:58 PM | 0 comments ;
sprinklinq love Y

badly

i'm thinking of you tonight
and all that i want to do

i wanna look into your eyes
like i'm looking into your soul

i wanna hold your hand
squeeze it tight like there's no letting go

i want you to hug me so tight
just to show me how much you've missed me

i wanna feel your kiss
just like the first time it felt so right

but most of all, i just wanna be with you tonight
like it's the last time you'd ever be mine


Thursday, September 28, 2006 | 6:11 AM | 0 comments ;
sprinklinq love Y


Call me crazy to fall for someone like you
I can't seem to help it coz i always do
The truth is you've always been special
Eventhough most of the time it didn't show

Oh i wish i could see the future
So i would know how it ends for you and me
I wanna know if this time it's for real
Or if fate is just playing with me again

Have you ever thought fate may be playing games with you
Coz somehow you always seem to keep coming back to me
I guess you you just got to stop and realize
That there's got to be a reason why this keeps happening

Maybe we should take it as a sign
Something we were just too blind to see
So take my hand now and never let go
Until we see an apple in an orange tree


| 5:51 AM | 0 comments ;
sprinklinq love Y

walk right through me

does history repeat itself?

this is a thought that comes to my mind today.

i'm in a situation where i feel it's like karma or something. i think the right term would be de ja vu. *damn.*

it's really frustrating.

you keep on trying to change something, some sad situation but then, you just can't.

it's always the same sad thing.

you start as if everything's fine, like everything's gonna be okay. then everything changes in one day.

i hate it!!

you give everything a try. you keep on trying. but you always end up being a joke.

you always end up being played with.

you end up always being a fool.

for believing in something that you wished so hard to work. for wanting something to last.

it's like believing a lie.

it's hard.

there's nothing else i can do but cry.

but why cry for something that's not worth the tears at all?

it's like fate keeps playing with me. how i wish things weren't that hard.

you let someone in your life just to have them ruin it for you.

and to go through things over and over again.

it's like you never learn.

you're suppose to learn from your mistakes. but it seems i never learn.

i keep getting hurt.

this has got to be the last time. and i gotta keep my word this time.

this time there's no looking back.

and i'm gonna need all the help i can get.



Thursday, September 21, 2006 | 5:07 AM | 0 comments ;
sprinklinq love Y

darkness

September 15, 2006 7:45pm

And now the house is suddenly quiet. No more screaming, crying or arguments. No laughter whatsoever or anybody talking. Everyone seems to be engrossed in doing something that doesn't count as nothing.

I just stare. Stare into the vast space around the room. Then I look at the river and watch the wind blowing against it. I sigh.

Enough crying. Enough regrets. Enough thinking of what could have been or wishing how things were different. It is all useless.

Coz this is reality. My reality.

You feel crushed and so empty and down and unhappy and restless and lost and really really sad. But most of all you feel alone and lonely. *crap*

Stop crying. It won't do much. It only confirms how you really feel. I only feel sad for you coz no matter how hard or how long you weep your heart out, no one is ever gonna hear you. Your crying is their silence.

Whatever happened to the rainbow after the rain? the sound of laughter? the singing and dancing? the smiles? Valentine's and cupids? the lively color of flowers and butterflies? kissing, holding hands and all the crappy things couples do? the opening of gifts on Christmas or Birthdays? the happy chatting between friends? Whatever happened to life which seemed happy and beautiful, wonderful and magical? Coz i can't seem to see it right now.

I am facing the corner. And it is dark.


Friday, September 15, 2006 | 7:45 PM | 0 comments ;
sprinklinq love Y


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